Hi there friends… and foe!!! This is my first and likely worst mPOL! (Worst only because I hope that future me continues to improve!) In case you’re wondering, an mPOL is a midway presentation of learning! What an mPOL is NOT is a way to solely demonstrate my strengths as a learner. An mPOL IS a way to showcase my growth and areas for further development as a student!
In this mPOL I will be using examples of my work to display what I’d like to start, stop, and continue doing as a learner and why doing so will benefit me as I continue learning.
The main talking point for this mPOL is that I struggle with a cycle of overthinking, procrastinating, and perfectionism. These struggles challenge my development and stunt my growth as a learner.
This unhealthy mindset leads me to expect my first piece of work to also be my last. An example of when this caused me difficulty is in my MindNode for The Outsiders project (we didn’t create a blog post for this), which also happens to be part of my first keystone in PLP. I had trouble starting it.. continuing it… and finishing it. I couldn’t get two sentences into my MindNode without deleting and starting over as I couldn’t find the perfect wording or idea. As I couldn’t keep anything on the page, I wasn’t able to refine ideas or edit my thoughts as there was nothing there. This resulted in me running out of time and having to hand in work that I wasn’t proud of and was even embarrassed by.
The same pattern happened with my Worldview art piece in The Outsiders project (still no blog post) where I felt I didn’t have a good enough idea to start on the project. When I can’t start a project or task, there is no opportunity to have it evolve. When I get caught up in perfectionism, I overthink and that leads to my procrastinating. Then at some point I realize I’ve taken too long to get work done and won’t have time to deliver work that reaches the standard I set for myself this then makes me anxious.
In order to manage this cycle or pattern of thinking, I’ve identified the importance of breaking down the overall project into a number of steps and committing time to work on these steps. This improved organization will help me set expectations for myself more constructively. An example where I effectively organized my workload was with my triptych in my Renaissance Project (link to work).
Continuing to break work requirements into manageable pieces will also assist me in knowing when enough is enough. What I mean by this is realizing how much effort different tasks require and not getting hung up on creating “perfect work” as this is unachievable and takes time away from making other work better.
In order to further combat my tendencies, I need to start acknowledging when I get overwhelmed. When I am having difficulty or struggling with work, the room can feel very loud and distracting. I get caught up in things happening around me and I frequently lose focus. I generally resort to thinking that I can’t do the work now so I’ll do it later, but later never comes.
I didn’t work on the mPOL during class time due to all the factors I’ve mentioned. Another element at play was my inability to review past work. Often I am disappointed and discouraged by reflecting on work that I’ve done because I only see the flaws. It makes me worried that those around me might view me as less capable because that is how I feel.
Though I didn’t recognize it before, I now know I can self advocate and communicate my situation to a teacher and ask to move to a more quiet setting. I will strive to do this as quickly as possible. I feel this is also a representation of my self-awareness.
Hopefully, by using these strategies, I will feel more comfortable looking back and reflecting on past work. Rather than only seeing the imperfections I’ll see the effort and the iterations that built it.
Despite what I have explained so far, my perfectionism can also be a positive quality when managed appropriately. It can encourage a positive iterative process and result in a final product that I am very proud of. My attention to detail is also heightened due to wanting to get everything “right”.
The PLP environment enables my curiosity which is a defining trait of mine. I enjoy exploring and questioning. I’ve represented this both within and outside of PLP by trying new activities (ski racing, basketball) and joining clubs (Tabletop Games, GSA). In relation to my classroom learning, I’ve embraced technology. I used to shy away from it and now I’m able to exceed and comfortably use the skills that technology allows.
My self-awareness is also a quality I am proud of and helps me grow as an individual. I will continue to work on my awareness and understanding to further my learning and personal development.
The combination of my curiosity and self-awareness presents itself positively in group projects. Through understanding my own impact on the group, and the group’s impact on each other, I am able to offer a logical perspective on our work. I believe that bring out the best in others on my team by being positive and making sure everyone is heard.
My hope with this mPOL is that I’ve demonstrated both the progress and the challenges I’ve faced this year. I feel both are important to recognize and learn from. I know that the mPOL has been a difficult task for me to create, as it requires reflection on my shortcomings. Regardless of this difficulty I am so grateful for the opportunity to grow through reflection as I recognize its importance and wouldn’t be by choice. I am so glad to continue my learning journey with PLP! This sums up my mPOL, thanks for stopping by!!
Questions?
Thanks, Kennedy