Let Me Explain My Train of Thought

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So, it’s time for an Explain Everything. See, I just did a visual essay on the impacts of railroads in Britain during the Industrial Revolution. Specifically, three of them: easier, faster travel, easier distribution of agriculture, and the breaking down of social barriers.

Now, my first draft of this was very much in need of improvement. Here it is so you can watch it:

The peer critique I got for this draft included making the audio louder, fixing the accidental repeat of the animation while I didn’t say anything at one point, fixing the static sound while I moved things, not using burgers for the food (as they weren’t around in the Industrial Revolution), adding more colour, using more images, and maybe adding music.

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So, for my second draft, did I make a solid attempt to fix all of these things?

No. I just rerecorded some of the audio so it was louder, removed the silent animation, and attempting to move things more quietly.

Here’s the second draft:

The feedback I got for that draft included, once again, adding more colour and photos, not using burgers, and making the audio louder. This time it also included not having a white blob around the people, using a map of Britain instead of the world, and having more interesting backgrounds.

To start out, I found better (and more colourful) backgrounds, including a map of Britain instead of the world. Then I attempted to remove any white blobbery from the people. While I managed to cut down the white area pretty significantly, there was still some, and some of the people’s limbs ended up getting cut down quite a bit. However, I decided to move on, and found a picture of an apple as an alternative to the hamburger.

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Here is the final draft of my Explain Everything:

While I still could have made some additions, like music, that would have improved it, I think it’s definitely a major improvement over my first draft.

Toodles.

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